USA
Part 5

One by one, the guys drifted off. Dick had his pizza run, Greg had a date with Lindy, and the rest of the guys had to leave for whatever reason. Finally, it was just Paul and me blading toward his house.

"What did Dick mean when he said Pop loved you?"

"Pop explained that already. Weren't you listening? What's the matter with you? You jealous or something?"

"Maybe."

"Jeez, Paul. Lighten up. Pop's feelings for me aren't the same as yours."

"How do you know?"

"'Cause I know the guy. Whatever makes me happy, makes him happy."

"Including you and me? Like together?"

"Yeah. Why not? He's not the jealous type. You know something? I think he loves us all."

"But mostly you."

"He knows me better than you guys... that's all. Anyway, it's cool to have a guy like Pop to rap with sometimes. He told me once that he's no more intelligent than we are... he's just been around longer... a helluva lot fucking longer," I cracked.

"You think he's gonna jack off watching that video tonight?"

"Would you?"

"You looked awesome."

"And you didn't? Hey, everybody did."

"How come you like everybody the same?"

"Maybe 'cause nobody's the same."

"What kinda answer's that?"

"Figure it out, kiddo. Hey, you wanna come over to my place?"

"Can't. We've got some rellos visiting."

When I arrived home, there was a postit note stuck to the fridge. 'Hi, Daniel - Andy and I have gone out to dinner. Back about 12. I've left a plate of pasta in the fridge for you. Bon appetite! Love you, Mom.'

So there I was. Home alone. Damn! After being with all those hotties all day, I was in the mood for some wicked sex, but it seemed that I'd have to settle for a jack.

Once I'd heated the pasta in the micro, I took the steaming plate of food to my room, undressed, and fired up the comp. No email. Fucking zip.

"Pop? Did I wake you?"

"No."

"You doing anything?"

"Not really."

I wasn't sure why it was such a buzz to blade down Pop's hall, but I enjoyed it. Maybe 'cause it was like breaking some rule or whatever, not that Pop had any rules.

"White and one?"

"I've got a feeling I'm gonna need something stronger than coffee, Daniel."

"Relax, Pop. I'm just at a loose end, and I needed some company. No offence."

"That's OK. I'm glad you're here."

"You watch the vid again?"

"Quick glance."

"Yeah, right," I laughed, then set about making two coffees. "Paul was a bit pissed about that stuff you were saying today. Y'know... about loving me. He was kinda jealous or something. But I told him that it was different with you. It is different. Isn't it?"

"How do you mean?" he asked as he sat at the table.

"Like you're not jealous of Paul or the other guys?"

"Yes and no. Yes because it would be cool to be one of you guys. And no because I'm not. Anyway, I get a great deal of satisfaction from seeing you happy... as well as the others."

"That's totally cool, Pop," I smiled as I placed the two mugs on the table. "I didn't fill yours to the top 'cause I thought you might wanna dash of brandy in there."

"Thanks... and you're absolutely correct. Two dashes."

"So," I continued after I'd added a nip or two to Pop's coffee, and sat opposite him, "how can you get your jollies outa something you're not involved in?"

"On the contrary. I am involved."

"You know what I mean, Pop."

"Daniel, remember that story you told me about Kyle in Cape Town... the swim meet... and you were yelling your heart out, rooting for Kyle?"

"Jeez, who could ever forget that? So damn wicked!"

"So where were you while you were screaming your lungs out?"

"Huh? What do you mean where was I? I was in the grandstand."

"So you were quite happy to root for Kyle even though you weren't in the pool with him? And you wanted to see him win even though he wasn't on your home team?"

"Yeah. But what's that got to do with...? Oh. OK. So it's like you're happy to be in the grandstand?"

"Ten outa ten."

"Are you really, Pop?"

"Put it this way, I can't be in the pool, but I can be in the grandstand. The third option is to be nowhere at all."

"So when you say you love me, is it like... y'know... a kinda granpop thingy?"

"Would you piss in your granpop's sink?"

"No," I cracked. "Well... I don't think I would. Hmmm. No, I don't think so. Depends on what he was like, I guess. I never knew him."

"Am I like a grandpa to you?"

"Kinda... only cooler. Hey, are you still gonna think I'm cool when I'm older?"

"Why wouldn't I?"

"'Cause I won't be a teen."

"You'll still be Daniel."

"Yeah, but I'll be different. What about when I'm like twenty or something. Or thirty?"

"When I was your age, I had no idea what I'd be like in ten years. And when I was thirty, I had no idea what I'd be like at forty. And until a short while ago, I had no idea that I was gonna bump into a scallywag like you. Glad I did, though. You make good coffee."

"Yeah, right. So what's the answer?"

"I don't know. I don't have a crystal ball. I don't believe in all that astrology, fortune-telling hocus-pocus, anyway. Here and now is what really matters, Daniel, and if we take care of the here and now, the future will take care of itself."

"Jeez, I can't even imagine myself at thirty."

"Can you imagine me as a teen?"

That cracked me up totally. "You got any pics of you as a teen?"

"A couple."

"Can I see them?"

I made another two coffees while Pop was somewhere in the house, rummaging through drawers, and cussing under his breath. A few minutes later, he was back at the table.

"Whoa! That's you?"

"Yep."

"Jeez."

"What's that supposed to mean?"

"You looked totally cool. I wish I'd known you then. Uh... sorry, Pop. That's not what I meant."

"I know what you meant, Daniel. And I take it as a compliment."

"You must've made a lotta guys as horny as all fucking hell."

"I did... now that I think back on it. But I didn't realize it then. At least, I didn't understand what was going on. And even if I had, I wouldn't have had the courage to do anything about it. That's why I admire you so much. You're doing all the things I never had the guts to do."

"It doesn't take guts, Pop. All it takes is a boner. I'm no fucking hero."

"You are to me. And you are to your friends."

"That's crap, Pop. I'm just one of the guys."

Pop responded by studying my eyes and chuckling. I liked his face when it dissolved into laughter. Kinda like Santa without the beard or the hat. Friendly and warm.

"What's so damn funny?"

"You. Sometimes you can be so incredibly invulnerable, Daniel. Invincible. A pillar of strength. Yet, you can also be struck down by a blow from a feather."

"That's bad, huh?"

"No. It's like Paul said... you're all huff and puff, but, underneath, you're just as vulnerable as the rest of us."

"Yeah. It's fucking embarrassing."

"You shouldn't feel embarrassed, Daniel. Being vulnerable means you've got a heart... feelings... sensitivities... a soul. I know you like to hide all that stuff, especially from your peers. It's only natural for you to wanna appear macho, and up there with the best."

"It's all so fucking confusing, Pop. I don't wanna be some kinda wuss, but I also don't think I'm a hero. Hey, don't get me wrong, I think I'm OK, y'know, but not like some kinda Superman or whatever."

"Heroes -- true heroes -- never see themselves as heroes. They leave that for others to judge."

"So you were a wuss? You don't look like a wuss in these photos. You look wicked, Pop."

"I was ignorant... or maybe just afraid of the truth. Either way, I didn't have the benefit of your courage."

"It's not fucking courage, Pop! Jeez! I get horny, and I wanna offload. What's so fucking courageous about that?"

"OK, maybe for you it's not courage. But a lotta people don't have the courage to be themselves... truly themselves. You do. So what would you call it?"

"Fuck, Pop, I dunno. Horny?"

"You're a scallywag," Pop cracked. "You wanna make another coffee?"

"Sure." I filled the electric jug, then turned on the power. "Hey, Pop? You got scans of those pics?"

"Yep... somewhere."

"Can you email them to me while I'm making the coffee?"

"Sure."

Five minutes later, we were both sitting opposite each other at the table once again.

"So how come you didn't ask why I wanted your pics?"

"Should I? Seemed like a perfectly normal request to me."

"I'm not perfectly normal, Pop."

"Thank God for that."

"You wanna know what I'm gonna do?"

"With my pics? Uh... I don't think so."

"Why not?"

"I'd rather not know."

"That means you do know," I cracked. "Hey, this is such a weird relationship, Pop, but I love it."

"Me, too," he grinned. "And thanks for coming around tonight. I know you were at a loose end, and that I'm not on top of your list, but at least I'm on the list."

"You're not on the bottom of the list, either, Pop. Actually, in a way, you're on a separate list, and you're the only one on it."

As it happened, it was just as well that Pop didn't wanna know what I was gonna do when I got home and printed copies of his pics. I spread them on the floor of my room, and jacked off all over them. Then I used the head of my cock to spread my truckload of thick, sticky boy juice all over the images of his teen face.

"Too bad I wasn't around in your day, Pop," I said aloud to myself. "It would've been totally cool."

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